Saturday, June 29, 2013

Mom is with our Lord and Daddy now.

          The last 48 hours have been full of emotions . I have driven to the nursing home 3 times. 2 with Rachel and Heather,  one with Brad and Heather.  The staff each time was sweet and gentle.     The 3rd time was to see her after she was"gone."
                   My Mom, Beverly S. Carey 4/22/1925 to 6/28/2013 may you RIP.
She left this planet shortly after she received her "Last rites."  I am not sure when we will have her services. The tears have been endless. I believe she is with our Lord and  my Daddy and that she no longer hurts. Her mind is once again sharp and her wit fine tuned. Her body moves with grace and she is smiling.
       We are left to pack up her belongings at the nursing home, I have numerous phone calls to make about her finances and who will pay for the  funeral fees.
      I am numb, sad, and yes also relieved. This blog is not over yet. I am sure other events will come up and need to be shared. For now I shall rest, God Bless you all.

Friday, June 28, 2013


2:15 pm on Thursday (6/27) Her doctor called, " Your Mom is resting, it is just  matter of hours maybe a few days."I called Rachel she got to my home quickly. Rachel, Heather and I headed for the nursing home stopping briefly to get yellow roses for Mommy.
        I was not prepared for how she would look. Her eyes all sunckin' in, her arms wrapped so her skin would not be damaged. Mom's breathing was so very labored, she stopped breathing several times. Long ago she signed off on "heroic measures"...which means no oxygen etc.
The nurses were so kind and we three sat and gently touched her face, spoke quietly and cried.
We stayed for a few hours, Mom did not show any signs of knowing who we were. We left after saying our good-byes.
         At midnight I called for an update she was resting and 8 am she has physically become rigid and her Social worker gently said she truly felt it would not be long.
          Here I sit making phone calls: the funeral home, the cemetery, County Social for medicaid, our Pastor. I just spoke with the Chaplain at the nursing home. My Mother was a Catholic in her early days. Last rites will be done at noon today..
        The end is in site and maybe just maybe there will be peace knowing she is with daddy and our Lord.. God Bless you all and thanks for reading.

Monday, June 24, 2013

Another passing

        One of the worst parts about Alzheimer's is not being able to share information that you know before the disease your loved one would want to know.
          My  mother married my biological father, Miguel,  in 1946  after several miscarriages she had me. Mom had lots of issues about my father being in the Military, in 1953 when I was 3 she divorced my father.
       She met the  man I grew to love and called Daddy  in 1961, he died almost 4 years ago.
       I only have 4  or 5 memories of Miguel, he was one of 16 children the surviving ones all except him reside in and around Santa Barbara.  I have always kept in touch with that side of the family.
          Over the years Mom would talk about him she said good things and bad but I believe she did love him once upon a time.
           I received a call late last night from my first cousin, Angie, Miguel had just passed away.
The emotions are many. He had pancreatic cancer, he faught a long battle but the disease won out.  He had been married to my step-mother for 58 years they have 5 children and numerous grandchildren.
          I am torn. Why him? Beverly is not even in this world any more she has no mind  to speak of and her body is breaking down daily. From what I know from my Aunts and cousins. Miguel's body was breaking BUT he was still sound of mind and his family gathered around him and helped him daily to live a rich live.
      I am in upstate NY the funeral is private in Virginia Beach. I'll send flowers. My parents are no longer here, I am an emotional orphan.
      I am glad I know the Lord, Psalm 27:10" When my father and mother forsake me,  then the Lord will take me up."

Monday, June 3, 2013

another truth

The most frustrating part of my mother's finances is that no one ever answers the phone with a real person. I have been sitting at my computer on hold with the VA for 25 minutes now. Whoever choose the MUSAC should be thrown in the brig!!!!
I would prefer to do this on the computer.  But; certain web sites do not like my Mac browser
My Daddy would be very un-happy  that after 28 minutes I have been disconnected And now they are closed....UGH!!!!