Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Last Friday I ordered flowers for Mom, she was 87 on the 22nd. The little flower shop I use is down the street from her nursing home. The arrangements they do are not only very pretty but affordable. I no longer sign our names to the card. I simply say, "You are loved." The nurses have told me she thinks they are from Daddy, that is fine with me. I no longer ask if the kids want to contribute,it is hard for them too. A good friend of mine has her mother living with her. Her Mom is about to turn 80 and has lived with my friend for 12 years. Ilene has some health issues but her mind is as sharp as a tack! MY friend, Deb,and her Mom fight all the time. When I stopped in Ilene and I spoke for a long time among the many topics. At one point Ilene told me how pretty she thought her daughter is and how much she appreciates all she does for her. I left after awhile and true to form cried all the way to my house. What I ( or any of us) would give to: A. have a conversation that made since, B. have loving kind words come out of our parents mouth, C. to know that the next time we visited they would remember what was said on the past visit. But alas that is no longer the case.

5 comments:

  1. Hi Jewels..
    Just found your blog today and read what you wrote about having a good cry over the things we wish for that we just can't have. I lost my mom to cancer in 2002 and to this day I will reach for the phone to give her a call. I am now a caregiver for my mother-in-law and although Betty remembers us, the challenges involved in them not recalling a "good conversation" or even the feel of walking on eggshells makes me wish for the old days when she was just calling us once a day for an hour long computer tutorial!
    I turned 61 and had no idea that meant I could change my hair color! How exciting! My husband will be very surprised but I will just tell him.. "Jewels said!" LOL

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    2. My reply that starts Lizzie was meant for you...HOpe you have a great day!

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  2. I read your past few posts, and I was touched by your shoe story and when the nurse said she'd tell your mom they weren't from you. We take all these things personally, but we all have to remember, it's the disease that makes them seem indifferent. I painted a picture for my mom and she said she didn't want it. She would have loved it before the disease stole her away. I do a lot of crying, too. My mom still remembers us, but the alzheimer's is moving right along, true to form. You are right, it is horrid! Please smile today, and know that you are not alone. :-)

    Lizzie
    www.wewerefive.blogspot.com

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