A call...

        Sometimes caller ID is not my favorite phone feature.
       Thursday  IT rang, it said Baptist Health, it was really early, I held my breathe and said, " HI."  IT was Cindy, she began the conversation with, " the aide who baths Mom noticed several bruises on Mom's person, they were on her arms, buttocks, ankles. Then Cindy added, " Your Mom can no longer walk or get in and out or up and down with out help by a lift."
        Cindy is fairly sure since each time this equipment is used ( which is several times a day) Mom fights screams and generally is not pleasant that the bruises are brought on by her struggle. Made sense to me.  I hung up and told Brad and Heather, my sweet Heather cried. I left the room and cried too.
         Late last night (Friday the 9th) it rang again, again the caller ID said Baptist Health. I held my breathe. This time it was a new voice. She was reporting that Mom had become so belligerent that the Psychiatrist just had written a script for a new drug to hopefully calm her down.
          It seems my mother is slipping farther away each day. With each phone call I am torn about braving it and going to see her.
          I am afraid to see her, I am afraid of her anger, I am afraid that when I see her she will.... I am JUST AFRAID!